Slip ‘n Slide

It has been a year since the Eaton Wildfire—a monstrous firestorm with eighty-mile-an-hour winds, devouring entire neighborhoods. My foothill community is at the base of those mountains. When the Eaton Wildfire blew through, the only thing left in its wake was loose dirt.

If only this rainstorm had come during the fire. Once again, only one month later, we were on alert—this time for mudslides.

Many of my friends, who were in the path of a mudslide, obeyed the mandatory evacuation.  My house is located on a hill, so we were considered safe.

While at work, the thunderstorms rattled the windows and my nerves.

At 5:30, I drove home and was shocked to find flashing lights and police cars blocking my street entrance.

After watching car after car try to drive through, only to get stuck in the muddy quicksand, I realized what had happened. Mudslide. All the roads leading up to my house were covered with thick mud.

I parked my car a safe enough distance away and decided to hoof it the mile to my house.

The rain attacked my raincoat’s hood like tiny bombs while I tried to zip it up. A Mercedes-Benz pulled up and parked behind me.

“Hello.” He opened his black umbrella so nary a drop would hit him.

Who was this guy, I wondered.

“Quite the mess.” I briskly walked past him.

I gave the officer a wave-off as he was parked.

“Hold on, miss!” He shouted after me.

“Hello officer,” I said politely, “I’m just heading up to my house.”

“No one is allowed up there. Go back to your car.”

I learned a couple of tricks from the last evacuation. “I have two children up there.”

“No! I can’t let you go up alone.”

I noticed Mr. Mercedes walking up.

“I’m not alone, my husband is right here.”

The young officer scowled, “You mean to tell me that you left two children in an evacuation zone?”

“We’re not in an evacuation zone,” Mr. Mercedes innocently offered up.

“We really have to go.”

He whispered, “He’s not going to let us up. I’ll call my…”

“How old are your children?” The officer interrupted.

“Not old enough to be alone,” I answered in a huff.

“Then why did you leave them?”

At that moment, I turned to Mr. Mercedes, “I told you, honey, we shouldn’t have left them alone.”

Deer. In. The. Headlights. A thought flashed across his forehead: Is this woman going to get me arrested? “Sorry, officer,” he said. “I can call – “

“Nope, we’re going.”

I slipped my arm around Mr. Mercedes and nudged along.

“Come back now! I’ll arrest you.”

“He won’t. Keep walking,” I whispered.

“Are you sure? He sounded very convincing.”

“Did he get out of his car?”

Quickly, Mr. Mercedes looked over his shoulder. “No. Do you really have small children at home?”

“Nope.”

“Well, it worked.”

I remembered! We’re wave-by neighbors.

I felt bad for Mr. Mercedes sloshing around the inches of mud in his Gucci loafers, while I slogged in my UGG boots. We marched past the Bobcats that were scooping up the mud and debris.

We made small talk until we arrived at his house. “Do you want to borrow the umbrella?”

“No thanks, I’m just up there a few doors.”

It’s not conventional, but an interesting way to meet your neighbors.

Party Animal

Because California is void of visible seasons, the only way to tell when spring has sprung is the return of the bears from a short winter’s nap. Ah…like the swallows returning to Mission San Juan Capistrano.

I have mentioned before that Boo-Boo, with his honey-colored fur, is our bear. Over the years, Boo-Boo has been a frequent visitor to my garage freezer in search of chocolate mint ice cream. Not this year. I secured the garage door so that it was flush with the driveway, closing off his access.

Thursday night, I found him rummaging through my trash.

“Welcome back,” I smiled.

I watched as he approached the secured garage door. His expression said it all before he left in a huff. “What’s this? I thought we were friends.”

Saturday night, I had an early dinner and Margaritas with friends. By eight o’clock, I was home for the night. Suddenly, Sam came running into the den.

“MOM! DO YOU HEAR THAT?”

Boo-Boo had returned. I flew out front. Shocked, I screamed, “NOOO!” He was ripping the wood off the garage door.

He looked at me and stopped. Then, he moseyed over and, with one paw, knocked over the trash can like a petulant child.

Usually, he would leave down the street. Not tonight. Tonight, my neighbors were celebrating their daughter’s college graduation. The smells of the taco truck caught not only my attention, but Boo-Boo’s as well. The gates were wide open. I could see the fifty or more guests seated at tables covered with pristine white tablecloths under an illuminated tent. Simultaneously, Boo-Boo and I saw the opening under the balloon arch.

Not at all dressed for a party, wearing jeans, a sweatshirt, and barefoot, I darted successfully, heading him off.

It played out in my head. The bear runs through the party, knocking over tables and tossing grandmas, uncles, aunts, and friends into the pool. The taco truck crashes, and hot grease ignites the chair cushions. They must be warned. Immediately.

I needed to be discreet, not go in yelling, “BEAR!”

I scanned the crowd until I spied my neighbor, Nick. In a quiet tone that commanded attention but not panic, I leaned up next to him, mindful I probably smelled of Tequila, and announced, “The bear! The bear! He’s in your front yard. NOW! We’ve gotta stop him from coming in.”

Nick looked confused, “Um, OK?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of everything. I just wanted to warn you.”

“Thank you, I guess.”

I dashed across the yard. By now, I was drawing a lot of attention. I’m sure they were wondering who this wack job was.

“Mmmm, he’s not here.” I whipped around. Wait a minute. Is Nick wearing a different sweater? No time to change clothes, for God’s sake. There’s a bear on the loose!

“The bear is here?” Nick questioned me, surprised.

I hesitated, “That’s what I just told you.” I felt like I was in a Hitchcock movie.  Now I was seeing double. Those Margies were stronger than I thought.

Nick laughed, “That’s my twin brother.”

“Identical,” I nodded.

From the front yard, I could hear voices shouting, “There’s the bear, walking down the street!”

“Jigs up!” The Nicks kindly insisted, “Please stay for tacos. A glass of wine? Some cake?”

“No, thank you. My mission is done here. Thanks for bearing with me.”

Fire

On that fateful Tuesday night in January, my sons, Jack, Sam, and I were leaving for the movies around five o’clock. Earlier that day, we dropped my daughter at the airport for Ireland. Everything felt lucky.

As we were heading out, news broke of a fire in Eaton Canyon, a few miles away. Living in the mountain foothills all my life, I had grown cavalier about forest fires. Still, in the end, we decided to skip the movie.

A powerful windstorm erupted, with wind gusts to 80 mph. Fire evacuation warnings soon became evacuation orders as the fire headed east towards us.

My phone lit up with texts. The fire is out of control. It’s burning through the canyons. Altadena is engulfed in flames. Altadena Country Club is gone.

We filled our cars with boxes filled with personal items. Evacuating is a bizarre situation. What to take after you have already secured the obvious valuables? Sam filled his car with his instruments and cameras. Jack grabbed his computer. Me, well, I grabbed a new jacket that still had the tags on it and a couple of good books. It never crossed my mind that I could be living in these clothes for days, weeks, or forever.

At midnight, the police drove by with a blaring, “Evacuate immediately!”

I stood transfixed in our driveway. I had never seen anything like it before. The mighty winds pushed the flames, and my heart sank. It felt like Atlanta burning from Gone With The Wind.

“Mom, mom. We got to go.”

I took the two dogs with me inside the Honda. Sam took the cat with him. We swerved to miss falling branches. The main road was a long line of red taillights. All hotels for miles were booked. Many had offered their homes as a refuge. I wanted to stay close. Our caravan turned onto a residential street lined with expensive homes.

I texted the boys, “Let’s park here for now.”

There was barely enough room for me inside my stuffed car, let alone a golden retriever and a Jack Russel. Socrates squeezed in my lap under the stirring wheel. Poor Lucky looked like a contortionist dog with his head down and legs pressed against the window. No one barked, not even when the homeowners looked inside my car. Seriously?

I awoke at 6:00 a.m. The air was thick with smoke, but the fire had passed.

“Mom, did you sleep?” Jack texted. “We didn’t sleep at all.”

“This proves I can sleep through anything. Let’s go see what’s happening.”

We drove back towards our neighborhood. Police officers blocked all the street entrances, fearing looters. Every lie I used in the past didn’t work this time.

“Follow me,” Sam texted.

That crafty kid knew a secret alley that had not been blocked. Only the locals knew about it.

I have never been so happy to see my house before than I was on that day.

Then came the reports of friends who lost so much. The tragedies are too large to wrap my mind around. Also, there are stories of heroes. Friends of mine with garden hoses risked their lives saving landmarks, houses, and their neighbors’ houses.

The next morning the boys left for Colorado. I stayed home with the dogs and cat in my house with no electricity and questionable water, but grateful… so grateful.